Tag Archives: letting_go

Fearless Aging

Lent and the Strangeness of Letting Go

By Shae Hadden | Bio

I’ve been looking for a way to be free all my life. My entire search has, unfortunately, been focused on the practical aspect of ‘holding on’ to whatever I thought would give me freedom: a belief in some system or way of thinking, money, possessions, favorite books that contained ideas that were ‘liberating’, any activity that loosened up my body and mind, people I loved. But now almost nothing is certain in my life, and a deep desire to let go of my attachments to everything and everyone propels me forward.

This sensation is visceral. It’s like a snake wriggling out of its skin, a baby bird struggling to climb out of the nest. What to do when my whole being wants to do something I thought impossible: drop everything I’ve gathered around me (including my clothes and possessions), take one step to the side, and then begin again…buff naked and unencumbered?

A friend was reminding me this is the time of Lent, a time of letting go of what no longer serves us. For some, the focus

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Fearless Aging

Life at the Growing Edge

By Shae Hadden | Bio

Several years ago, a wise 93-year-old man named Hayden shared with me his principles for living life “at the growing edge”. He had printed them on cards, in the shape of a bookmark, and distributed them to everyone who engaged in meaningful conversation with him. Today, as I’m recovering from the first major surgery I’ve ever had, I was drawn to reflect on a couple of them again. I’m sure he wouldn’t mind if I shared them with you now:
  • I may accept life, just as it is, here and now, observing it and experiencing it without judging it and without becoming its victim, or trying to control it. The past year has been an interesting experiment in developing this ability. Health challenges are often an opportunity to practice surrendering while being responsible. We are constantly making choices in life, and some of them support health. Others don’t. When the ones we make don’t turn out to be in our favor, we can be responsible for them or we can blame ourselves for making ‘bad’ choices. Sometimes, that blame gets pushed out onto others, or surfaces in unrelated expressions of frustration. When we can step back and treat ourselves with compassion, we can see that oftentimes our ego (our ‘self) tries to control how we relate to our health (for example, by telling us we’re fine and to keep operating as normal or by making a big deal out of something inconsequential). Either way, our Higher Self (the ‘I’ that chooses and is aware when we are ‘un-conscious’) knows there is another way of relating to our health that doesn’t involve control. Which leads to …
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Learning

The Lightness of Being

By Shae Hadden | Bio

The green-crested hummingbird is at my window again this morning, hovering in mid-air sunshine and snatching bits of food from the plants as they begin to bud. He appeared in my life a few weeks ago, and has been coming back every day without fail. Today his weightlessness seems like a metaphor for a new way of Being. I have a choice about who I am being in the world, and I choose to be as light and iridescent as this beautiful bird. This isn’t about reducing my body to its less than 115-pound weight or changing my hair color and wardrobe. Nor is it about casting myself differently in different situations or seeing myself from different angles or perspectives.  Lightness of Being is about letting go of all that weighs us down: negative thoughts, beliefs, actions, habitual patterns of pain or suffering…anything from our past that keep us chained to the earth and that limits us from becoming who we choose to be and living the life we want to live.  This is the only way for human beings to fly—by consciously setting themselves free. read more