Tag Archives: commitment

Agreement and Alignment

By Shae Hadden
Bio

In a recent conversation with my sisters, I was reminded that people don’t necessarily have to agree with the how, why or when of a particular possibility. But they do have to be aligned on the ‘who’ and the ‘what’ in order to move forward together—and the ‘who’ has to include a commitment from each person involved to the possibility of the ‘what’. In fact, disagreeing with the specifics of how to create a possibility adds value to the conversation and can inform and, in many cases, contribute to the success of the venture—whether it is the creation of something intangible (like a relationship) or tangible (like a product, project or organization).

For
most, agreement occurs when one person surrenders their point of view
to accept another point of view. Essentially, one perspective wins, the
other loses, within the context of agreement. An example: in
negotiations, the struggle for power is a struggle between perspectives
that has the winner take the dominant position at the head of the
table. Agreement is an either/or proposition. It does not allow space
for collaboration, respect or trust.

Alignment, on the other
hand,

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Balance: My Choose-o-Meter

By Shae Hadden
Bio

I’ve had some further insights since my last post about Balance.

No matter what the extent of my commitments, I see ‘balance’ as my ability to be ‘grounded’ and ‘present’. In each moment, I’m doing what I’m doing…and just that. Nothing else. The whole idea of ‘balancing work and life’, as if they are polar opposites, makes no sense to me.

Life is everything I experience.

Work is what I choose to label as work. Pleasure is what I label as ‘play’. Both work and play are made up of the actions I take as I live.

Balancing

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Idleness

Darlene and I have spent a couple of lovely days in Seville. I am learning about Spanish history—which is pretty bloody over all, but also has produced some incredible art and architecture. It is always amazing to me how we require a few days ‘off’ before we begin to unwind, relax and really ‘be’ on vacation. Having the Internet is a bit like cheating, but I am beginning to let go of other commitments for a bit and just take each day in stride.

We were having a conversation this afternoon

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Agreement and Alignment

In a recent conversation with my sisters, I was reminded that people don’t necessarily have to agree with the how, why or when of a particular possibility. But they do have to be aligned on the ‘who’ and the ‘what’ in order to move forward together—and the ‘who’ has to include a commitment from each person involved to the possibility of the ‘what’. In fact, disagreeing with the specifics of how to create a possibility adds value to the conversation and can inform and, in many

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Wasting Time

I am not sure it’s possible to waste time. It is possible to spend time, and waste is always a judgement relative to some standard or expectation of what we should be doing with our time.

We can use time to do things that we judge as having maximum or high value. When we are really up against a deadline and there is more to do than we think can be done in the time allotted, we can even somehow create time.

Yet, there are many times when I just don’t feel like doing whatever it is I think I

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Giving Your Best

By Shae Hadden
Bio

As the evenings get cooler and days shorter here, summer holidays wind down. Everyone seems to be preparing for the start of September, and looking forward to the last real weekend before things start up again. Most everyone I talk with has enjoyed some of the summer outside with family and friends, and I find myself experiencing a twinge of regret. For me, the last few months have been a blur of work indoors in front of the computer, interspersed with a few brief moments of relaxation. This afternoon, I am acknowledging that I have ‘missed’ this summer altogether in my efforts to fulfill as many of my commitments as possible.

I
am reminded, once again, that we cannot ‘give our best’ day in and day
out unless we also give to ourselves. And sometimes the best we gift we
can offer ourselves is a new perspective on time. For the point of view
I have held until now (that time is a precious resource that I don’t
have enough of), has left me drained and unsatisfied. I wonder what
happened to unprogrammed time to relax and smell the roses, to be in
the company

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Giving Your Best

As the evenings get cooler and days shorter here, summer holidays wind down. Everyone seems to be preparing for the start of September, and looking forward to the last real weekend before things start up again. Most everyone I talk with has enjoyed some of the summer outside with family and friends, and I find myself experiencing a twinge of regret. For me, the last few months have been a blur of work indoors in front of the computer, interspersed with a few brief moments of relaxation. This afternoon,

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Empowerment

I was speaking with a friend today about how we sometimes feel
‘disempowered’ in certain situations where people repeat their patterns
of the past and where we have no ‘accountability’ for the outcome. I
realized as we were talking that we generally look at ‘being empowered’
as a solution in our careers and personal lives—as the pathway to the
promised land that will deliver us from whatever circumstances are
challenging us in the moment. When

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Body Beautiful

By Shae Hadden
Bio

Summer has finally arrived here in the Pacific Northwest, and with it the seasonal display of beachwear trends. No matter what the fashionistas may be sporting on the runways, the beaches are where the reality of the North American body is exposed for all to see. Most of us attempt to do what’s possible, given our lifestyles during the winter. We’re not there just for the sun and surf. We’re trying to look the best we possibly can with the bodies we have so we can attract attention, whether for purposes of relationship or just plain admiration.

I
had always hoped there’s more going on here at the beach than just the
mating, dating and gawking games. But watching where everyone focuses
their attention in the throng of volleyball-playing, swimming,
strolling and picnicking crowds seems to prove me wrong. The natural
attraction seems to be to the trim, fit, energized bodies being
displayed in all their glory. Few look at bodies exposing belly fat,
pale flesh and flab. As I grow

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