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Mar 2010
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12-Step Program for America: Step 1

Monday Mar 01 2010

By Jim Selman | Bio
I work with organizations that are attempting to change. At the beginning of working with a new client, I point out what’s missing for any organization that has recurring or seemingly intractable problems: what’s missing is a different way of observing. Whether we’re talking about a company, a community or a continent, a new perspective always gives us an opening to create new possibilities, have new choices and take new actions: a new way of observing the world effectively gives us a different future than some variation of ‘more of the same’. We need to stop asking what the problems are and start asking why they persist. When we do, we begin to realize that we have a paradigm problem. Until we deal with that, none of our seemingly intractable problems—from staggering debt to unending war, climate change to the underlying causes of the mortgage crises—can be solved. Albert Einstein expressed this concisely when he said that sometimes our problems cannot be solved by thinking the way we thought when we created them.[Read More]

Written by eldering at Wisdom in Action

Tagged with: 12-step addiction america cause choice common conservatives constitution constitutional control declaration democracy freedom independence liberals of paradigm problem program step vision

Breakups and Broken Hearts

Tuesday Feb 16 2010

   By Jim Selman | Bio
There are two kinds of break-ups. The ‘soft’ breakup is where both parties in a relationship more or less stay in communication and talk about their differences, their discontent or their changing needs until they arrive at a conclusion that “This just isn’t working” and agree to go their separate ways. Sometimes they remain friends. In any case, this kind of mature and honest ending allows both parties to let go of past expectations or disappointments, eventually reach some degree of  ‘completion’ with the romance and move on with their lives. The ‘hard’ breakup is when[Read More]

Written by eldering at Fearless Aging

Tagged with: blame breakup broken_heart choice forgiveness gratitude love relationship

Destiny

Tuesday Dec 08 2009

By Shae Hadden 

Choose to wait, wish and hope. At the end of your life, when you reflect on the chance encounters, strange coincidences, unlikely timing, and uncanny events you experienced, you may say that all of your 'bad luck' was your 'destiny'.

Choose to be, do and have. At the end of your life, when you reflect on all the chance encounters, strange coincidences, unlikely timing, and uncanny events you experienced, you may say that all of your 'good fortune' was your 'destiny'.

Do you see the difference?

(Condensed from a TUTS Adventurers Club Thought for the Day)

 

[Read More]

Written by eldering at Wisdom in Action

Tagged with: choice destiny luck

Boundaries: Choosing Change

Monday Nov 30 2009

   By Jim Selman | Bio
We’ve all experienced a situation—whether in a marriage, friendship or business relationship—where we find ourselves thinking about the other person and saying, “I love you, BUT…”. It’s in that moment we realize a particular behavior of theirs is not acceptable to us and has become a source of stress and resentment. For many, resentment almost always leads to a downward spiral of self-destructive behavior and the eventual destruction of the relationship. I was coaching a friend recently who is in such a dilemma.[Read More]

Written by eldering at Personal Empowerment

Tagged with: addiction boundaries change choice commitment habit possibility relationship risk

Low Energy and Burnout - Part 2

Monday Nov 23 2009

By Jim Selman | Bio
When we know that there is an end to a particularly strenuous period of work, we can feel energized and become even more productive. When we think that the flow of work is endless or that we have no choice in the matter, then we may begin to break down, feel disempowered, become tired. Life begins to feel like a burden. I have found that resolving these kinds of chronic negative moods about workload and feeling overwhelmed begins by[Read More]

Written by eldering at Health

Tagged with: burnout choice low_energy mood presence stress

Changing the World

Monday Nov 16 2009

   By Jim Selman | Bio
In a recent New York Times op-ed column, Bob Herbert challenged all of us to get down out of the bleachers and take on at least one of today’s intractable problems. He pointed to the courage of many Civil Rights activists in the '60s and '70s, including Andrew Goodman who was murdered by the KKK and of course Rosa Parks. We remember these individuals and many like them because, like revolutionaries everywhere, they put their lives on the line for something worth dying for. They stood[Read More]

Written by eldering at Fearless Aging
Join discussion COMMENTS [1]

Tagged with: activism activist andrew_goodman castro chiapas choice civil_rights future rosa_parks tiananmen_square

The Future Habit

Monday Nov 09 2009

   By Jim Selman | Bio
It is almost impossible to turn on the television or read a newspaper or a magazine without encountering one pundit, expert or “man on the street” either talking about the future or trying to blame someone for something. Our media commentary is rarely about what is happening now: mostly it’s about what happened in the past or what someone thinks is going to happen in the future. Combine the establishment media with all of the blogging and chatting going on, and it is incredible how fixated we are on what will happen next.[Read More]

Written by eldering at Wisdom in Action

Tagged with: choice commitment control force future habit past possibility prediction relationship transformation

Giving Up 'Giving Up'

Friday Nov 06 2009

  By Jim Selman | Bio
My partner and I were recently enjoying one of those lazy weekend mornings just chatting about life in general when we got onto the subject of getting older and how we feel about it all. I made the point that my passion and The Eldering Institute® is about transforming our culture’s view of aging and teaching people that we can change how we relate to the future—and, as a consequence, we can have more choices, more possibility and more ‘aliveness’ than what most people can expect as they grow older. Moreover, I reasoned, once people are empowered as they age, they are free to contribute more, build partnerships with the young and make the difference they always wanted to make—to even take on the world’s intractable problems. [Read More]

Written by eldering at Fearless Aging
Join discussion COMMENTS [1]

Tagged with: aging choice eldering giving_up possibility transformation wisdom

Global Warming & Our Commitment to the Future

Monday Oct 12 2009

   By Rick Fullerton | Bio


Recently, I have been focusing more and more of my attention on global warming and, in turn, on understanding my own reactions and responses to what’s happening. The results so far have been both fascinating and challenging. One aspect of the global warming conversation involves the role of the media in reporting scientific evidence and projections regarding the effects of carbon dioxide in heating the planet. In particular, I have learned about

[Read More]

Written by eldering at Wisdom in Action

Tagged with: choice climate_change commitment community future global_warming leaders post-kyoto

Mastery

Thursday Sep 24 2009

   By Jim Selman | Bio
Over the course of my lifetime, I have heard many  ‘bottom-line’ bits of wisdom. For example, “the key to happiness is loving what you do”.  Or, “at the end of the day, you can either resist life or surrender and live life on life’s terms”.  These kinds of nuggets are usually true and are certainly valid in a list of maxims and aphorisms for living. “All I Really Need to Know I Learned in Kindergarten” by Robert Fulghum is a great example of this genre. My favorite (and the one that I have personally found the most useful) is one I first heard in the 1970s in something called the ‘est training’. The ultimate choice we have as human beings, we were told, is whether we are ‘at the effect’ of our circumstances or whether we can relate to them ‘at cause’, meaning be responsible for everything in our lives.[Read More]

Written by eldering at Fearless Aging

Tagged with: acceptance choice mastery relationship robert_fulghum wisdom

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