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Breakups and Broken Hearts

Tuesday Feb 16 2010

By Jim Selman | Bio

There are two kinds of break-ups. The ‘soft’ breakup is where both parties in a relationship more or less stay in communication and talk about their differences, their discontent or their changing needs until they arrive at a conclusion that “This just isn’t working” and agree to go their separate ways. Sometimes they remain friends. In any case, this kind of mature and honest ending allows both parties to let go of past expectations or disappointments, eventually reach some degree of ‘completion’ with the romance and move on with their lives. The ‘hard’ breakup is when[Read More]

Written by eldering at Fearless Aging

Tagged with: blame breakup broken_heart choice forgiveness gratitude love relationship

Guilt

Monday Aug 25 2008

By Jim Selman | Bio

I have been talking about ‘completion’ a lot lately. It is basically that state of being where we can let the past be in the past and not try to control everything to make the future turn out the way we want it. Completion is a necessary state if we want live in the present. One of the things that keeps us from being complete is guilt. Guilt is a waste of time. It is blaming ourselves for whatever we think we’ve done wrong. As far as I can tell, it is also a cover-up for not being responsible for whatever we did that we’re feeling guilty about.[Read More]

Written by eldering at Fearless Aging

Tagged with: blame choice completion guilt judgment responsibility